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Myfanwy 2

June 2018

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Myfanwy 2

Go Go Torchwood Rangers! - Chapter One

Title: Go Go Torchwood Rangers!
Author: Milady Dragon
Prompt: Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: the Movie
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Rhys Williams, Suzie Costello, Gwen Cooper, Andy Davidson, Tenth Doctor, Donna Noble, The Master, Rose Tyler, Mickey Smith, Yvonne Hartman, Lucy Saxon, River Song, Sarah Jane Smith; Jack/Ianto, Rhys/Gwen, Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler (past), Tenth Doctor/The Master (past).
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood, Doctor Who, or Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.  Torchwood and Doctor Who are owned by the BBC, and the Power Rangers by Saban Entertainment and the Toei Company.

No Adipose, Weevils, Comets, New Zealand tourist sites, or snowglobes were harmed in the writing of this story.  The Toclafane, though, were scratched up a bit.
Warnings:  Crack.  C'mon, it's Torchwood Power Rangers, what else could it be?
Author's note:  Thanks to the usual suspects for poking me to get this done.  I really appreciate it!  This is written for Reel Torchwood Round Five.  Some might consider that a shame...that it got written, that is. 

Summary: The Power Rangers lose their powers, but still have to protect Cardiff from the evilness of the Master, who is bent on taking over the world.



Chapter One

Jack Harkness loved being a Power Ranger.

It wasn’t the adventure – although that was absolutely amazing.  It wasn’t the whole ‘saving the world’ thing either – but there really wasn’t anything more rewarding than fighting off the alien hordes without any sort of acknowledgement.   And then there was the fantastic team he had – because, if they hadn’t been thrown together as Rangers, Jack doubted he’d even have spoken with them, and when it came to a certain Ianto Jones, that would have been a crime.

Nope, the best thing about being a Power Ranger was the idea that he and his friends could wear clothing colour-coordinated to their Ranger personas and no one caught on.

It was blatantly obvious that Jack and his best friends were the Power Rangers.  There were six of them, and there were six Power Rangers.  They each wore the same colours that they did when they morphed.  They had communicators that didn’t look a thing like the wrist watches that most people mistook them for.  They had a tendency to disappear at the drop of a hat…or, at least, at the appearance of one of the garishly costumed monsters they fought off every week. 

And only Ianto wore glasses, so they couldn’t rely on the ‘Clark Kent Effect’, which their mentor, the Doctor, had once claimed.  Jack was pretty certain the Time Lord had just been blowing it out of his arse with that explanation.  Besides, they wore helmets for crying out loud; no one could tell if they were wearing glasses or not underneath.

Plus, honestly, the way Suzie bitched about wearing pink really should have been a dead giveaway.

Jack loved it.  He loved the very notion that his friends were the Power Rangers and no one seemed to realize it.  They could bring as much attention to themselves, and the entire population of Wales just wouldn’t get it. 

Take that morning for example.

Jack and his five best friends were kitted up in complete skydiving gear, and were riding in the back of Diane Holmes’ plane as the pilot – a friend of Owen’s, no less, and she didn’t know they were Rangers, either – flew them over one of the rare, clear areas of Bute Park, where someone had laid out a rather large target on the ground.

There was a crowd there, too.  Waiting for Jack and his friends to land on that particular target, all in the name of fundraising for the Greater Cardiff Observatory, which was in danger of being shut down.

Jack had to admit…this was another great thing about being a Power Ranger.  Even though no one knew about it, the vast majority of the people they were acquainted with fully expected Jack and his ‘team’ to do such death-defying stunts in order to help out a great cause.

Most kids would be getting ready for applying to various universities by now, instead of being adrenaline junkies after their next fix.

“Two minutes before we’re in position,” Diane called back from the cockpit. 

Jack grinned.  He just couldn’t help it. 

He took in his best friends.  Each one seemed to be getting more and more excited about flinging themselves out into midair; Suzie and Toshiko were high-fiving each other, while Owen was checking the parachute on Rhys’ back.  Ianto was buckling on his helmet, and Jack had to admit his boyfriend looked fantastic in his red jumpsuit.

Well, Ianto honestly looked fantastic in anything.  Jack was just glad that Ianto had become the Red Ranger, since red was definitely his colour.

Ianto caught him staring, and raised an eyebrow, which Jack interpreted as Ianto-speak for, I know you think I’m gorgeous; can we please jump out of the plane now?

They weren’t alone on the plane, but then Jack had to blame Rhys for that, since it was his girlfriend and her tagalong that were with them.

Gwen Cooper was a constant source of entertainment, in that she was always trying to figure out just who the Power Rangers were, and she’d roped her childhood friend, Andy Davidson, into her quest to discover their true identities.  It was horribly ironic that she was actually dating the Black Ranger, and didn’t have a clue that the reason Rhys would break dates with her was because he had a duty to beat the crap out of all sorts of monsters that their nemesis, that particularly evil witch, Rose Tyler, would create in order to destroy the world.

Donna, the Doctor’s assistant, claimed that Rose and the Doctor had dated for a while.  If that were true, then Jack could certainly understand why Rose was insane and wanting to blow shit up.

“We good to go?” he called out over the sound of the plane’s engine and the wind whistling through the open door at the rear of the craft.

He got various affirmatives from his friends, but Gwen took one look outside the open door and shouted, “Where did the ground go?”

“Thirty seconds,” Diane informed them, giving them a thumbs’ up over the back of her head.

“Lead on, Gwen,” Suzie teased, taking her place near the front of the door.

“You’re the one who wanted to do this,” Rhys reminded her.                  

“Of course I do!” Gwen exclaimed.  “It’s just that…I didn’t think we’d be so far up!”

“Step aside and let the professionals handle this,” Owen replied, grabbing onto a convenient handhold next to Suzie.

“Since when are you lot professional anything?” Andy snarked.  He didn’t look at all happy at being there, and Jack wondered exactly how Gwen had convinced him to make the jump.

“Five seconds!” Ianto called out, his stopwatch at the ready.

Of course, when Jack saw it, he almost forgot about the jump…

Suzie was grinning manically.  “I’m outta here!” With those parting words, she launched herself out of the plane.

Owen was next, shouting something unintelligible, followed by Toshiko and Rhys.  Jack and Ianto met at the open door, and Ianto gave Jack a look that that had him grabbing his boyfriend around the waist and pulling them both out into open air.

Jack whooped, letting go of Ianto almost reluctantly but loving the feel of freefall.  He flung his arms out, laughing, and he could just make out Ianto’s own laughter not far to his right.  He didn’t waste a thought on Gwen and Andy, who would jump if they wanted to; this was all about the sensation of almost flying, and he let gravity take its course.

The jump didn’t last long enough for the adrenaline junkie that lived in Jack’s soul.  Before he knew it, he was pulling the ripcord and his fall to Earth was arrested, the trees around Bute Park getting closer and closer.

He could make out the announcer over the speakers announce each landing; they all touched down in the same order they’d left the plane, and Jack couldn’t help but laugh when his own feet touched dead center of the target.  He did stumble forward as the wind caught his chute, but he managed to pull it down and toward him, gathering it up. 

“Six for six!” the man over the speakers exclaimed.  “The team from the Torchwood Academy makes it six for six!  With the money raised today, the Greater Cardiff Observatory gets a new lease on life, just in time for the arrival of Comet Myfanwy!”

Jack met his teammates in a round of back-slapping and laughing, managing to get a short snog and a grope from Ianto.  They’d done it, but then Jack hadn’t expected anything different.

After all, they were the Power Rangers.

Even if no one else realized it.

**********

After ascertaining that Gwen and Andy had, in fact, jumped out of the plane and that they’d completely missed the target area, ending up somewhere in the trees about half a mile away, the team decided to head out to their favorite hangout, Sarah Jane’s, the local internet café/juice bar/gymnasium/martial arts dojo/hot dog stand for lunch.  Of course, since they did that, they completely missed going past the construction site where they were building the new Skypoint luxury flats…

Which meant they missed the workers there finding the really big iron plate set into the ground just where they were about to sink a support beam for the multi-level building.

**********

Sarah Jane’s was the place to be if you were a teenager in Cardiff.  The owner, Sarah Jane Smith, had completely kitted out the large building to cover everything that a growing, hyper-active teen could want to do, and it was there that Jack and his team found themselves after changing out of their skydiving gear and back into their colour-coordinated outfits that they were so well known for and yet no one actually understood meant that they were, in fact, Power Rangers.  They took up one of the larger tables on the patio, eating their hot dogs and guzzling fruit juice like it was the finest ambrosia.  Well, everyone except for Jack, who was too busy showing Luke, Sarah Jane’s young son, some martial arts moves that had had absolutely nothing to do with what he’d learned since he’d become the leader of the Power Rangers.

“Hey!” the proprietor herself called out as she carried another tray over to their table, more juice and hot dogs piled up on it, as well as the chips that Owen had ordered.  “No karate on the patio!”

“Well,” Jack said, giving her his best smile, “it’s technically Tae-Kwon-Do…”

“And it’s still encouraging my son to flail about close enough to the main window to break it out with a badly-placed kick,” the older woman chided. 

Jack recalled the one time he’s mentioned her to the Doctor; the Time Lord had gotten a dreamy look on his face, and Jack had to really wonder just how many women he’d dated in the Cardiff area.  Well, at least Sarah Jane hadn’t gone nuts and started growing weird monsters in order to fulfill some sort of need for mass destruction…

“So,” she said, putting the tray down and moving out of the way of the rampant, hungry teenaged hordes, “do you all have anything fun planned for the weekend?”

Jack took his seat and snagged one of Owen’s chips.  “I thought I’d had plans, but the person I’d had plans with preferred to go comet-watching instead…”  He aimed his most deadliest pout at Ianto, who seemed to weather it fairly well.

“I’m going to be at the Observatory on Sunday,” Ianto answered, “and Jack, I told you, you’re more than welcome to come with me.”

“Toshiko and I are going to check out the newest dance club,” Suzie replied, taking a sip of her pink-coloured juice, making a face at it then setting it back down and mumbling something about ‘bloody pink’. 

“We’ve heard about it, but don’t know much about it,” Toshiko agreed.  “Owen, Rhys…you’re welcome to join us.”

“And yes, you can bring Gwen, Rhys,” Suzie teased. 

Rhys rolled his eyes.  Jack knew he was well aware how they all felt about Gwen, but Rhys really liked her, so they did try to include her.  Besides, the pool on when she’d finally catch on to her boyfriend being the Black Ranger was now up to around five hundred pounds.

“Don’t let them give you grief, Rhys,” Sarah Jane said, patting him on her shoulder.  She tucked the tray under her arm and headed off to her other customers, dragging Luke along with her in order to avoid any possible insurance claims.

It was just in time to miss each of the Rangers’ ‘watches’ going off, the chiming noise noticeable to anyone who would have been walking by. Luckily the six friends were alone, or it might have given the game away to anyone who could do basic maths and think outside the box.

Jack looked around furtively and then answered the call.  “What’s up, Donna?”

“If you yobbos are finished throwing yourselves out of planes,” the outspoken woman said over the comm. unit, the tinny speaker not disguising any of her sarcasm, “then can you get back to the Hub?  Space Man wants to talk to you all.”

This was why Donna was awesome…she’d never once dated the Doctor, and yet was just naturally crazy…in a good way, that was.

Jack stood up, cramming the rest of his last hot dog into his mouth.  “Let’s go, team,” he said…or tried to say around one of Oscar Mayer’s best.

It was a credit to his friends that they did not react to the rampant grossness, although Ianto barely restrained an eye roll.   Jack wondered if it hurt when his boyfriend did that.

They ducked around the nearest convenient corner, taking their ‘usual positions’ with Jack in the front of the formation, and each snapped their hands to the concealed morphers at their waists in an eerily synchronous movement that spoke of long practice in front of several mirrors.   They teleported to the Hub in a trail of rainbows and sparkles.

Yes, Suzie complained about the teleport effect as well.  Toshiko had tried to fix it, but Jack suspected that the Doctor kept changing it back out for some weird notion only the Time Lord was aware of.  Ianto said it was in an effort to embarrass them, and Jack had to admit he might have been correct.  After all, none of them felt the need to restrain themselves in that department, and the Doctor was such a fantastic target.

Jack adored the Hub.  It was shabby and high-tech and somewhere under Cardiff where no one would ever think to look.  Of course, who would really imagine searching for a secret underground science fiction superbase under a water fountain on the Plass, of all places?

The Doctor was racing around like he usually did as they materialized in the main section of the Hub.  The Time Lord was a skinny, human-looking male, whose clothes sense made Ianto flinch.  Donna stood off by the side, just watching, her arms crossed under her breasts and an amused smile on her face. 

“What’s going on?” Jack asked, as he and the other Rangers joined her.

“I’ll let him explain,” the red-head answered, “because I can’t do it justice.”

“Our thermionic sensors have been hit by a cataclysmic blast of evil!” the Doctor exclaimed.  He sounded almost happy.  “Rangers, we have to act quickly; the entire planet is in danger!”

“So what else is new?”  Ianto murmured.

He had a point.  The world had been in danger on a weekly basis for about four years now.

“Danger from what?” Toshiko asked, actually sounding curious.

The Doctor spun, leaning against the main control console that ran things in the Hub.  “Far in the future, there was this really lovely man named Professor Yana.  He was so lovely that everyone adored him.  But then, one day, he was revealed to be one of my own people, only criminally insane, and a fantastic actor to boot.”

Jack wondered just what it was about Time Lords that everything they touched went bananas…and found himself taking a step back from the Doctor out of sheer self-preservation, wondering if the Doctor had dated this Professor dude as well.  That might explain a few things.

“Anyway,” the Doctor went on, “he called himself the Master and decided to remake the human race into something else entirely.  He was finally stopped by a Resistance led by a beautiful woman named Martha Jones, and was imprisoned within a hyperlock chamber and shot into the time vortex, never to be seen again.”

“Go on, Spaceman,” Donna goaded.  “Give them the happily ever after.”

The Doctor shot her a glare.  “The hyperlock chamber managed to exit the vortex and bury itself under Cardiff, where it’s been dug up by some rich ape who wants to put up a building of flats.” 

“And I suppose it’s up to us to go and bury it again,” Owen snarked.  “Why am I not surprised?”

“Hey,” Jack said, “at least it’s different from the monster of the week we usually get.”  Honestly, he was excited to get back into action. 

He couldn’t wait. 

Oh yeah, he loved being a Power Ranger.

**********

Rose Tyler was quite insane.

She knew it, and reveled in it.  Being classified as nuttier than a fruitcake meant she could get away with all sorts of stuff and it would all be excused as her acting all crazy.

Being mad was quite liberating.

She thoroughly blamed the Doctor, but really…he’d done her a favour.  Now she could stomp on the pitiful humans in whatever way she chose, and didn’t have to explain herself, since she was insane.  Everyone blew it off as being yet one more symptom in her ongoing psychoses folder. 

Rose considered Earth hers, so when she got pinged by an evil pulse, she went immediately to warn whoever it was off her turf.  And, if she had to, she’d give them a hotfoot that would burn their arses.

She took her favorite minions with her.  Mickey Smith had been her boyfriend before the Doctor had come along, and he still hung out with her even though, in technical terms, she was bat-shit crazy.  She rewarded his loyalty by letting him design her monsters, and he seemed quite fine with that.

Her second favorite was Lucy Cole, an old school chum who had managed to achieve insanity without ever having met the Doctor.  It had been quite a feat, and Rose thought Lucy was quite awesome for managing it.  Yes, her dress sense wasn’t all that great – she seemed to be addicted to red – but Lucy more than made up for that in sheer awesome evilness. 

Rose’s other favorite was Yvonne Hartman.  Yvonne was a wee bit bossy, but she was like a motivational speaker from Hell and Rose could really appreciate that.  Yvonne could whip every monster she met into a frenzy of self-appreciation and turn them into bouncy go-getters.  It was quite scary, and anyone who scared Rose was pretty okay in her book. 

The evil ping she’d received turned out to have come from a construction site in Cardiff.  Of course it was Cardiff, because that meant the Power Rangers would get involved.  Rose really hated the Rangers, since they were keeping her from what she thought of as her destiny of controlling the Earth.   There were times when she thought about conquering the rest of the planet first and saving Cardiff for last, but then her crazy impulses would just take over and she’d dismiss the idea. 

The four of them teleported to the site, and Rose grimaced when she saw the large, round metal plate in the ground.  Someone had thoughtfully cordoned off the area with the bog standard yellow crime scene tape, which meant there wasn’t anyone around to disturb them.  It never ceased to amaze her that the local coppers thought that, if you put up enough tape, no one would bother their scenes of crime.  It certainly helped her out.

“Another weekend,” she sighed, “and I’m traipsing through a construction site with the Three Stooges.   Mum did warn me there would be days like this.”

“What the hell is this?” Mickey asked, kicking the plate with his foot.  Luckily he was wearing sturdy shoes or else he’d have broken his toes.

Rose really wanted to sigh dramatically, but managed to refrain.  She could hear Jackie in her head, going on and on about hanging out with the wrong crowd.  “See this symbol?” she pointed at the multi-layered twist that looked like nothing more than a fancy numeral ‘8’.  “That’s a Time Lord symbol.”

“Ooo,” Lucy cooed.  “Anything Time Lord is a good thing.”

Rose begged to differ, but then they hadn’t dated the Doctor and she could excuse them their idiocy….some of the time, at least.  Still, she couldn’t resist pointing her index finger at it and releasing a bit of the Vortex energy she’d absorbed from her time with the Doctor, the golden energy shattering the metal plate and sending shrapnel all over the area…not that Rose cared, since her power shielded her, but it was fun watching her flunkies run for cover.

What she hadn’t expected was the sandy-haired man practically catapulting himself out of the box that had been covered by the plate.

“He’s kinda cute,” Lucy murmured, checking the guy out.

“He’s a bit of all right,” Yvonne agreed. 

Rose rolled her eyes.  The girls could be so easily distracted, honestly…

The man stood on the lip of the hole, rolling his shoulders and working out the kinks.  “Thank you,” he said, giving her a winning smile.  “I haven’t been out of that thing in millennia.  It was beginning to get a bit ripe.”  He bowed, although there was a touch of sarcasm in the gesture. “So, who do I owe the honour of getting me out of that prison?”

Rose hadn’t expected a person to be locked up underneath that plate, so she thought she owed it to herself to be a bit slow on the uptake.  “I’m Rose Tyler,” she finally introduced herself.  “I’m here to warn you that Earth is mine, and I don’t like surprises on my home turf.”

“Yes, well,” the man answered, “I didn’t expect to be here, either.  Earth, you say?”  At Rose’s nod, the man grimaced.  “I don’t suppose the Doctor is still around, is he?”

“Are you kidding?” Mickey snorted.  “She dated the sod.  It’s why she’s nuts.”

The strange laughed.  “Then we have something in common!  I dated him too, until he found someone he liked better.”  His tone had turned distinctly bitter.  “That man’s the biggest slut I’ve ever met, I swear.”  He sidled a bit closer.   “You don’t mind if I destroy him, do you?”

Rose smiled her best, unhinged smile.  “Not at all.  You’d be doing me a favour.  Him and his Power Rangers have been a thorn in my side for years!”

She thought she heard Mickey make a comment about puns, but ignored him. 

“Then I should go and take care of that,” the man returned the smile with one equally unhinged.  “Oh, I’m the Master, by the way.”   He reached out and took Rose’s hand, kissing the back of it.

Rose felt a definite simper coming on, but thought a noise like that was a bit unbecoming an evil witch such as herself.  “Pleasure,” she said, removing her hand from his grasp as soon as she could.

The Master winked at her, then proceeded to kiss both Lucy’s and Yvonne’s hands; Lucy actually making that very sound that Rose had stifled, while Yvonne complimented his technique.  He didn’t kiss Mickey’s hand, which was a bit of a shame, if she was honest with herself.

Nah….being honest with oneself was too highly overrated. 

“We’ll leave you to it,” Rose said, gathering her minions around her once more, although she had to really ignore Lucy’s pout.  “But don’t forget…Earth is mine.  You can kill the Doctor and destroy the Power Rangers all you want, but that doesn’t mean you get to hang around afterward.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” the Master smirked, waving insouciantly.



Chapter Two



Comments

Oh this is brilliant so far. I will be completely honest and say that I LOVED the Power Rangers when I was younger. Tommy was my favourite.

I think I am going to enjoy this ride.
Thanks! I hope you enjoy the rest.

I admit...I liked Billy. ;)

First line

Before I go any further, I must stop and say GREAT FIRST LINE!!!!

"Jack Harkness loved being a Power Ranger."

Re: First line

Thanks! Jack just seems the Power Ranger type, doesn't he? *laughs*