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Myfanwy 2

June 2018



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Myfanwy 2

Torchwood Blues - Chapter Four

Torchwood Blues - Chapter Four
Author: Milady Dragon
Beta: kanporinpoche 
Artist:  chosenfire28 , whose amazing art is here
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood; it's owned by the BBC.  I also don't own ideas drawn from the movie "Undercover Blues"; that is owned by MGM studios.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Eleventh Doctor, John Hart, Gwen Williams, Rhys Williams, Kathy Swanson, Andy Davidson, Toshiko Sato, Eugene Jones, OC's, Owen Harper (mentioned), Amy Pond and Rory Williams (mentioned), Alonso Frame (mentioned);  Jack/Ianto, past Jack/John, Gwen/Rhys.
Warnings: Violence, mild sexual situations, language, Mpreg (mentioned), Character Death (temporary)
Spoilers: For all seasons of Torchwood and possibly for Season Five of Doctor Who.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 20,999 (finished)
Summary: In the aftermath of the 456 invasion and the birth of their son, Jack and Ianto retire from Torchwood and decide to travel.  Nearly a year later they end up in New Orleans, where they're dragged back into Torchwood business when an old enemy steals a dangerous piece of alien technology.
Author's notes: This was written for tw_bigbang , and is my first time writing something like this.  This story is based on situations from the movie "Undercover Blues" starring Dennis Quaid and Kathleen Turner.  It's also a fix-it, in that certain events that occurred during the entire run of Torchwood happened quite differently; examples being that Toshiko, Owen, and Ianto never died, Owen is not a zombie, Ianto is immortal, and Gwen didn't break the Retcon she received after her discovery of Torchwood.



Chapter Four




The Time Agent now known as Captain John Hart really didn’t like Louisiana, for various reasons.

He particularly didn’t care for the abandoned factory he’d taken up residence in.  It was practically in the swamp, the mosquitoes were hell, and it was so humid he had to drink water…water!  If he’d drank what he wanted to – like the case of hypervodka he’d brought to Earth with him – then he’d have run the risk of killing himself by dehydration.  Not quite the way he wanted to die.  Now, if it was death by sex, well…that would be fun.  He wouldn’t have minded that.

Plus he had to lie low, if he didn’t want the Shadow Proclamation on his arse, and not in a good way.  Goddess knew, he’d racked up enough felonies to have them permanently after him, but this job he really didn’t want to mess up.  Selling the cyber controller to the highest bidder would mean he could retire to the Vegas Galaxies for at least a couple of years, and he didn’t want to risk that.   And having the auction on the planet where the tech had been stolen from was a stroke of genius.  It meant that those damned Judoon couldn’t come down and make things ugly for him.  Hell, it didn’t matter to him if they picked up the winning bidder later, just as long as John got his money.

The strong-arm types he had working for him were pretty easy on the eyes, too.  Okay, so Earth did grow them attractive, but that didn’t mean the ex-Time Agent had to like it there.

Speaking of strong-arm types…two were currently escorting Colonel Sanchez into the room where John had set up his living quarters for the duration of his stay.   “Colonel,” he greeted, practically purring the man’s rank, “nice to see you.  Love the uniform, by the way.”  He’d managed to get the man into bed by their second meeting, which just proved that, no matter how backward this planet was, the inhabitants were still susceptible to the Hart charm. 

Then he noticed that Sanchez wasn’t walking all that steady.  “And…you’re limping.  What the hell happened?”

The colonel passed off the reinforced case to one of John’s flunkies, then came forward as quickly as he could.  “Nothing I couldn’t handle,” he answered.

John about choked on the free-floating testosterone.   “What happened?” he asked again, intending to get the truth.  If the idiot had somehow jeopardized his plan…

“There was a change in checkpoint security.  I had to use a grenade to get out, and caught some shrapnel.”  He sounded almost proud.

The flunky with the case – and John couldn’t remember his name, but liked to call him Tight-Arse – was checking the contents; he nodded to indicate that Sanchez hadn’t, in fact, completely screwed up.

“I see.  And it didn’t occur to you that that sort of behavior would get you noticed?”   Oh why did he have to deal with stupid people?

Sanchez invaded his personal space.  Normally, John wouldn’t have minded, but he had this thing about screwing people with apparent IQ’s less than his shoe size.  “I know that thing is valuable,” the UNIT colonel murmured.  “That’s why I took the risk to get it out of there.”

John allowed a smirk to decorate his face.  “And you did get it to me.  Well done.”  He grabbed the man by his lapels and pulled him into a heated kiss.

Oh, it was too bad, what the man could do with his tongue…

It only took five seconds of contact before the poison lip gloss did its work.

John pulled back, then pushed Colonel Sanchez away.  The UNIT man couldn’t control his fall, and ended up on his back, wide eyes staring upward. 

Captain John Hart watched as his pawn died.  And, once that last breath was taken, he turned to his minions.  “The colonel will no longer be working with us.”

The sounds of the open market bustled around them.  Jack had the privilege of reading from the file the Doctor had brought, and it wasn’t at all interesting.

“Eugene Jones…2616 Magazine Street…Occupation: researcher, Dynagon Industries,” he intoned, as Ianto was checking out the bananas in the stall they were currently standing in front of.  “Boring life…boring guy.” 

He glanced over; Ianto looked engrossed in what he was doing, but Jack knew his husband well enough by now to know he was absorbing everything that Jack was saying.  They’d been discussing plans to get John’s attention, and going in through Jones seemed the best bet. 

“Hey, Mr. Harkness-Jones!”

 Both Ianto and Jack glanced toward the voice; it was Sergeant Davidson and Lieutenant Swanson, threading their way through the crowd.

“Lovely,” Ianto murmured, as Jack slid the file down the back of the new pram they’d bought that morning, to replace the one Jack had destroyed the night before.  “Can I Retcon them…please?”

Jack didn’t respond; he didn’t have to.  He should have known the police would still be interested in the mugging last night, but he’d at least hoped they’d give him a couple of days’ peace. 

“Cute baby,” Swanson said, leaning over the pram and making funny faces at Ianto Gareth.  The boy seemed to enjoy it.  “Boy or girl?”

“God, I hope so!” Jack quipped, earning an eye roll from his husband.

“He’s a boy, lieutenant,” Ianto answered, making Jack want to growl as he used Swanson’s rank.  He’d have to have his husband say it later on, when they were alone and Jack could attack him without garnering an arrest for performing lewd acts in public.

“Coffee?’ he suggested instead, this time earning a smile from Ianto. 

“I’d love an espresso,” the younger man said.

Jack began pushing the carriage down the aisle, Ianto right beside him.  Swanson and Davidson moved aside, but began to walk with them. 

“Captain,” Swanson began, “can we talk frankly?”

“Well sure, lieutenant.”  Damn, he just couldn’t say it as sexy as Ianto could.

“Now, what you did to those two guys…I’m sorry, what did you say you did for a living?”

Jack knew she was trying to catch him out, and he decided to play along.  “I’m an airline pilot.”

“Thought you said you were a vacuum cleaner salesman?”  She sounded vaguely triumphant.

“Well, if you knew…why’d you ask?”

Swanson didn’t look very happy at that, and Jack couldn’t care less.  She seriously needed to go back to interrogation class, because what she’d been taught wouldn’t work on a drugged-up Hoix.

They managed to curtail any more questioning until all four had been seated at a small café around the corner from the market.  They each ordered a coffee, and the waitress was barely away from their table after bringing their drinks before Swanson was starting in again.

“What you did to those guys…that was on a professional level.”

Jack grinned.   He wasn’t about to admit that he’d been given intense hand-to-hand combat training while back in the Time Agency.  “Well, you know…growing up on the mean streets – “

“Mean streets?” Swanson scoffed.  “You’re from Lima, Ohio!”  She made it sound like the capitol of Peru.

“It’s pronounced Lie-ma, like the bean,” Jack corrected, pretending irritation at the error.   It covered the spike of humor he suddenly felt; Ianto had changed all of Jack’s “paperwork” to show he that he’d come from that particular town when the older man had become addicted to Glee.

Ianto glanced at him, and Jack could read the smirk in his husband’s eyes.  Of course the very carefully planned back story for Captain Jack Harkness would hold up to the most stringent scrutiny; after all, Ianto had created it.  “How did you know that?” the Welshman asked.  Jack was pleased with just how surprised he sounded.

“I have a friend who works for the FBI,” Swanson answered, looking and sounding a bit smug.

“She has hidden depths,” Jack snorted, taking a drink of his coffee.  It wasn’t as good as Ianto’s, but it would do.

“What else did you find out?” Ianto asked.

“Nothing about our sex life, I hope,” Jack leaned toward his husband, leering.

“I’m going to blush,” the younger man murmured, his shoulder rubbing against Jack’s.

“You weren’t blushing last night.”  Jack couldn’t recall blushing being a part of what had happened last night.  That was, of course, after his husband had finally accepted his apology about getting into that knife fight.

“Oh, I was.”  Ianto’s voice went down nearly an octave, and did amazing things to Jack’s libido.  “I was blushing all over.”

Jack leaned in even closer, his lips ghosting across Ianto’s.  “Oh yeah…” he breathed, pressing in for a kiss that quickly turned quite passionate, for them being in a public place.

“Excuse me!”

The detective’s strident voice cut through the very pleasant haze that kissing his husband usually caused in Jack’s head.  They broke apart, and the older man couldn’t help but notice that Ianto was, indeed, blushing a bit.

“Who are you working for?” Swanson demanded.  “Are you some sort of spy?”

“Why do they always assume you’re the spy?” Ianto groused.

“Look, it doesn’t have to go beyond me,” the woman went on, seemingly not to have heard Ianto’s complaint, although Jack did understand just what the younger man was getting on about.   “I can help you…you can trust me.”

Well, that comment pretty much meant that Jack wouldn’t trust her.  No one said that and really expected it, did they?

He decided a subject change was in order.  “You know what’s funny?”

“Funny ‘ha ha’ or funny ‘strange’?” Ianto asked, catching his husband’s change of mood in that way he had.

“Are you listening to me?” Swanson acted as is she was about to burst a blood vessel.

“That gray van over there…” Jack indicated the aforementioned vehicle, parked across the street.  “It’s been sitting there for about seven minutes now…with the engine running.”

“So?” Swanson demanded hotly.

Jack just raised an eyebrow at her.  “In front of a bank?”

With that, Jack stood.  He gave Ianto a quick kiss, then began to walk toward the strangely acting van.  He just managed to catch his husband saying, “C’mon, sweetheart…let’s watch your daddy play Big Damn Hero….”

It was at times like this, that Jack really missed wearing his greatcoat.  It would have added much more flash to his saving the day.



is the beginning of Hart: macabre!
but then, very funny!
it will really prevent the robbery of the bank before the lieutenant?
Jack's a hero! He has to stop the robbery! :)
Oh, I WISH for the swishy coat!
The coat does make an appearance later on... :)