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Myfanwy 2

December 2018



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Myfanwy 2

The Men from TORCHWOOD - Chapter One

The Men from TORCHWOOD
Author: Milady Dragon
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Jack/Ianto, Illya Kuryakin/Napoleon Solo; Tosh/Diane
Warning: Language, violence
Spoilers: Up through Season Two, "Something Borrowed", although this is an alternate take on the entire series. None really for "Man from U.N.C.L.E." although I have kept Illya's and Napoleon's retirement professions from "The Fifteen Years Later Affair."
Disclaimer: I don't own "Torchwood" or "Man from U.N.C.L.E.", just kinda playing a bit with them. 
Author's Note:  This is a prequel to my Torchwood Big Bang story, Torchwood Blues (LJ) (DW).  In that story, Jack and Ianto have had a CP for over a year, and this is about the events leading up to that Civil Partnership.  Since this is an Alternate Reality, certain things are different; for one thing, Gwen didn't break the Retcon in "Everything Changes" so she isn't a member of Torchwood;  Owen wasn't killed in "Reset"; and Diane Holmes didn't leave in "Out of Time" and is, in fact, in Torchwood.  As is Tish Jones, Martha's sister.  This is also a crossover with "Man from U.N.C.L.E.". 

Summary: Between alien interference, overprotective uncles, well-meaning teammates, and a disastrous stag do, how do Jack and Ianto cope with events leading up to their Civil Partnership?


Chapter One

The U.N.C.L.E. at the Train Station Affair


The train from London to Cardiff was on time, much to Illya Kuryakin’s relief.

There had been a time when he’d loved to travel.  He’d spent a majority of his employment as Section Two, Number Two for the United Network Command for Law and Enforcement traveling all over the globe, putting himself in danger for the safety of the world.  And, when he’d retired from the field and had begun his own business, he’d traveled quite frequently in order to build up his international clientele.

But now, as he was hitting the middle of his fifties, his company had gained worldwide notoriety, and he had many able people to take over for him, Illya found himself ready to step back and simply enjoy his life. 

For some reason, that enjoyment didn’t include any sort of train or plane or ship transport.  He preferred to stay in London, where the main branch of his fashion design house, Vanya’s,  was based, living with his long-time partner, Napoleon Solo, and reveling  in his need to do nothing more than to relax into his late middle age…because he flatly refused to refer to it as anything else.  He’d broken the nose of one person who’s referred to him as a senior citizen.

He’d done the one thing he’d never thought he’d done:  he’d settled down.   And, to think…there had been a time when he’d believed that he’d never live to the point where he could, in fact, do that very thing.

He was traveling today, though, for family.  There was no way he was going to miss his only nephew’s Civil Partnership, not when he’d almost lost track of the boy after that disaster that had been Canary Wharf.  Illya didn’t have enough family to be losing one member.   He wasn’t about to do anything to risk his relationship with his sister’s son.  He just wished that Natalya had lived to see this day.

Of course, it helped that he’d had company on this trip.  But then, Napoleon wasn’t about to miss the festivities, either.  Not when he loved Illya’s nephew as much as his blood uncle did.

“I can’t remember the last time we were in Cardiff,” his partner said, as they made their way down the platform.  There wasn’t much of a crowd, being the middle of the day and on a Tuesday.

“I believe it was for Mica’s birth, Napoleon,” Illya answered, hitching the strap of his laptop case onto a more comfortable position on his shoulder. 

“You’re right, of course.” Napoleon had his own laptop case with him, but he carried his in his hand, not wanting his suit jacket to get wrinkled.   “And now, our nephew is getting married.”

Illya felt a warmth spread through him at Napoleon saying ‘our nephew’.  There had been a time when his partner hadn’t wanted to assume, but that had been before what was left of Illya’s family had accepted Napoleon into their admittedly small circle.  “I’m not so certain of this Captain Harkness,” Illya replied.  

“It can’t be because he’s Ianto’s boss,” Napoleon scoffed.  “If that were true, then you and I would never have gotten together.”

Illya waved his hand in dismissal.  Napoleon had been his direct superior in U.N.C.L.E., as well as his working partner long before their relationship had gotten much more intimate, all those years ago.  “No, but you have seen what we’ve managed to dig up on him.”  He didn’t elaborate, not wanting to speak out in even the sketchy crowd at the station.  He’d been a spy long enough to know that it took just one person to overhear a secret to make it common knowledge. 

The first thing they’d done, of course, was to check into their nephew’s chosen partner; still having contacts in the spy game meant they could find out pretty much anything.  And Illya had been concerned at what they’d discovered.

“I have,” Napoleon answered. “He’s quite good looking.  I have to say, Ianto has excellent taste in men.  Almost as good as yours.”

The Russian rolled his eyes.  “I flatly refuse to stroke your ego.”

“Then maybe you wouldn’t mind stroking – “

“Napoleon!”  Honestly, the man had the tact of a bulldozer.  “We’ll discuss that later on.”

“I hope so…oh, I think our ride is here.”

Illya turned in the direction Napoleon indicated, hoping to see his nephew.  Instead it was a small woman with dark skin, holding up a sign that said ‘KURYAKIN-SOLO’ printed neatly on it in black marker.  He tried to stifle the sigh of disappointment, but his partner noticed.

“You know he would have been here if he could have,” Napoleon said.  “Something must have come up.”

Illya was well aware of just who his nephew worked for.  Torchwood had had a certain reputation among the intelligence community, and Illya had objected to his nephew working for them at first, because he’d hoped that Ianto would have joined U.N.C.L.E. instead and to follow in his footsteps.  Instead, he’d been recruited right out of University to a position in Torchwood London, before any other agency could get to him.  Illya had tried to talk him out of it, but he should have known better.  Ianto Gareth Jones was just as stubborn as Illya’s sister Natalya had been.

And, when Canary Wharf had reduced the Torchwood Institute to an outpost in Cardiff and the main Archive in Glasgow, Illya had thought that Ianto would have had enough, and would have come to him for help.  Instead, the young man had gotten a job at Torchwood Three, despite all the hell that had happened to him. 

Of course, it hadn’t been until much later that Illya and Napoleon had found out about Lisa.    To be honest, Illya hadn’t been all that impressed with the young woman the one time he’d met her, but Ianto had loved her…apparently enough to risk the world to save her.   Ianto had called him during his suspension, and Illya had arranged for him to come to London to stay with him and Napoleon.  They’d gotten the entire story from him then.

 From the rant he’d gotten from Rhiannon, his niece hadn’t been happy that her only brother hadn’t called her about it first, since he’d been in Cardiff and much closer to her.  The problem with that was Rhiannon simply wasn’t privy to the secrets that Ianto was, and there had only been two people he could have turned to over the affair.  Illya’s and Napoleon’s security clearances were still very much valid, and Ianto had been able to confide everything to them.  Rhiannon didn’t even know that their mother had once been KGB, the same as Illya before being transferred to U.N.C.L.E.  As far as she knew, Natalya Kuryakin had been an assistant to the Russian Embassy in London until she’d married Daffyd Jones, their father; and that Lisa had been in some sort of coma after the Battle of Canary Wharf…which Rhiannon believed had been some sort of terrorist attack. 

So much had changed since that broken young man had arrived on their doorstep…and now, Ianto was having a Civil Partnership…with his boss.  Illya just hoped the man deserved Ianto’s love.

“I think you’re waiting for us,” Napoleon said as they approached the young woman.  If they’d still been in the spy business, they would have been very wary of walking up to a complete stranger.  But those days were long over, and the only attention that Illya got anymore from people who either wanted a job, or who wanted him to design something for them.  And since he’d stepped back except for Fashion Week, when it was necessary for him to appear at shows, those were both much fewer and far between.

The young lady smiled.  “Hi,” she greeted them.  “I’m Tish.  Tish Jones.  Ianto asked me to come and collect you.  He told me it was fine to let you know that the team got called out on an emergency.  Since I’m not a field agent, I get to play taxi service.”  She seemed nice and genuinely pleased to meet them as she dropped one side of the sign and held out her hand to them. 

“Nice to meet you, Tish Jones,” Napoleon said, turning the hand and pressing a light kiss to the back.  “I’m the Solo half of that sign: Napoleon Solo.  The quiet one is Illya Kuryakin.” He returned her smile, cranking up the Solo charm.

Illya took her hand after Napoleon was done with it.  “I’m quite able to introduce myself,” he snarked.  “Please excuse my partner, but if I were any less an Atheist I wouldn’t hesitate to say that he thinks he’s God’s gift, as it were.”

Tish rolled her eyes good-naturedly.  “Thanks for the warning.  But, if I can handle Jack, I think I can handle Mr. Solo.”

The Russian liked her already; she wasn’t one to have her head turned by Napoleon’s antics.  Although that didn’t shed a good light on Ianto’s fiancé, if he was worse.  “We have baggage and a couple of cases that need to be collected, but then we’ll be ready to go.”

The young woman nodded.  “Why don’t you do that, and I’ll pull the car up?  That way we don’t have to carry anything very far.” 

“We’ll meet you outside then, Ms Jones,” Napoleon answered gallantly.

She grinned.  “It’s Tish, please.   I’ll be back in a sec.”

They watched as she walked away.  “I wonder if the rest of Torchwood is that pretty,” Napoleon mused.

Illya barely managed to keep from elbowing him in the ribs for that comment. 


It didn’t take long to get the car loaded – actually, it was a black Range Rover with the word ‘Torchwood” rather ostentatiously emblazoned on the front fender panels – and to be on the way to the St. David’s, where Ianto had gotten them reservations.  Illya had been grateful for it, not really wanting to stay with Rhiannon and her husband and children.  Well, David and Mica were all right, but Johnny could be a bit of an idiot…

“I have to admit,” Tish said, as she pulled into traffic, “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you both ever since Ianto said you were coming.”

“Oh?” Napoleon prompted.  He’d taken the front seat, while Illya was in the back…drooling over the high-tech equipment that Torchwood obviously had access to.  Just because he’d gone into fashion design, didn’t mean he’d lost his appreciation of computers and technology.  He kept up with all the serious science journals.

Tish nodded.  “He’s said nothing but good things about both of you.  He’s really proud of you, you know.”

Illya smiled slightly.  “We’re proud of him, too.  We wouldn’t miss his getting this Civil Partnership for anything.”

“He’s so nervous about it, but he’s trying really hard not to show it.  Apparently Torchwood has bad luck, where marriages are concerned.”

“What do you mean?” Napoleon asked.

“Well, from what Jack’s said, anytime someone from Torchwood has tried to get married, things…happen.”  She flicked her eyes into the rearview mirror, catching Illya’s eye.  “You know, with alien invasions or the world ending, that sort of thing.  Jack’s trying to keep him from worrying, but nothing seems to be working.  I think he’s hoping that, with you two here, Ianto will feel a bit better.”

“We’ll do our best.”  His nephew’s concerns made sense.  U.N.C.L.E. had been very much aware of Torchwood in its time, and it could be inferred that aliens didn’t take the same holidays or special occasions as human beings did.  The annual London Christmas Invasion was a prime example. “But Tish…what can you tell us about this Jack?  Ianto has been very sketchy in the details.”

Illya could feel Napoleon’s eyes rolling, and didn’t care.  He just wanted to make certain Ianto wasn’t making a mistake in marrying a man who seemed to be even more of a lothario than Napoleon had ever been.  Not to mention the immortality thing…which Illya was certain he wasn’t supposed to know about, but his sources at U.N.C.L.E. had been very thorough in their research of his possible future nephew.

The young woman laughed.  “Ianto warned me you might try to pump me for information, you know.”

“He wouldn’t be my nephew otherwise.”  Illya was actually a little put out that Ianto had said anything about it.

Tish’s eyes smiled at him from the mirror.  “Jack is…Jack.  He’s incorrigible and gorgeous and probably the biggest flirt you’ll ever meet…but he’s also a hero.  And I mean that.  What he’s done to save this planet, you’d never believe.  But, more than that…he loves Ianto.  I wish I’ll be able to meet someone who loves me only half as much some day.  I don’t know if that answers your question, but that’s how I feel.”

No, it really wasn’t, because while Tish had touted the man’s heroism and his intense feelings for his nephew, he was still disturbed by the fact that he was apparently a determined flirt.  And yes, he’d accepted that in Napoleon, but there still had been times when his partner’s behavior had bothered Illya.  They’d gotten past it, but if one couldn’t respect their partner…Illya hoped that this wouldn’t be the case with his nephew.  After everything Ianto had been through, he deserved to be happy. 

He’d have to keep an eye on this Jack Harkness. 

And, if he proved to be wrong for his nephew…then, Illya might not be able to kill the man permanently, but he knew enough former spies that he could make the man’s very long life a hell. 





Oh my gosh, a crossover of two of my favorite shows! *squee* I was meaning to read "Torchwood Blues" but now I've committed to reading this first! :D

I love how you write Illya and Napoleon! I like them as civil partners better than I thought I would. (I'm glad I saw that last UNCLE TV movie...) Having Illya as Ianto's uncle is SO WIN! His apprehension of Jack is so funny! I like how you're making Illya/Napoleon and Jack/Ianto so similar! :D

Can't wait for the next chapter! Thanks for coming up with this: I can already tell it's gonna be SO MUCH FUN!
Man from U.N.C.L.E. was one of my first fandoms, so it's kinda like coming home writing Illya and Napoleon.

And let's face it...Ianto needs spies in his family. *nods*

I was a Man From U.N.C.L.E. fanatic when I was younger. I had such a mad crush on Illya/McCallum (he still looks great)! Reading this has been like a homecoming for me too and I'm looking forward to more... :)
OMG Love the man for uncle i had seriouis very young girl crush years ago. Love it and can't wait for next chapter
I did too, it was one of my first fandoms. I just had to write this crossover.

Thanks, hon!
I'm sitting here leaning forward, willing the page to be longer. Can't wait for more!

More in a couple of days!
darn, chapter is finished already...
Love the fact they care about Ianto and worry about Jack being good enough...
And yeah, Torchwood and weddings...what can possibly go wrong..?
Those are famous last words! :)

Wow I seriously loved Illya Kuryakin when I was young - well David MacCallum. Love the idea of him being Ianto's uncle and I just know I'm going to enjoy reading this. Can't wait for them to meet Jack again and I just know that TW weddings are fun. This is a great idea and I look forward to more.

I felt the same way about DMC, and in fact he was the reason I started watching NCIS. I just loved the idea of Ianto having spies in his family, because he's got that whole "spy" vibe going.

I do hope you enjoy it!
I love this beginning.
Just by reading TW blues, I was myself told I would have liked to know the beginning
How they got married, met ...
and introduction of uncles so suspicious of Ianto is a perfect excuse!
Well, his uncles have some pretty high standards! :)