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Myfanwy 2

October 2018



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Myfanwy 2

Welcome to Armageddon! - Chapter Five

Welcome to Armageddon! - Chapter Five
Title: Milady Dragon
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Jack/Ianto, Gwen/Rhys, perhaps others later.
Warning(s): Language, violence
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood, and that's too bad.
Author's Note:  This bunny attacked me after seeing a certain picture posted by </a></b></a>bookwrm89 , although these aren't quite the Horsemen she had in mind.  I'd also like to dedicate this to her, as well as a big hug and a hope that everything will be better soon.   *Hugs*

Also, this bunny apparently awakened a dormant Gwen-muse that I didn't know I had.  I'm not quite sure how this makes me feel...oh, and this very much AU.  And a bit silly. 

A/N2: Sorry, meant to have this up earlier, but with the temperature just above freezing and the melt-off of snow around here, the cold and damp has really affected my tendonitis.  Makes typing a little slower, and work a little harder.  I'll try to get the next one up a bit sooner.

Summary:  It's Gwen Cooper's first day in the Armageddon Department...


The next several hours were filled with paperwork and preparation for the upcoming Armageddon. 

Gwen couldn’t believe how much actual work went into just getting ready.  She must have filled out over a dozen forms, and her wrists were starting to ache from all the typing she was doing. There were forms for everything, from who had dominion over which souls, to who went to whichever Heaven or Hell after death, and even a Reincarnation form that had had Gwen giggling with all the choices that souls could come back as; but when she got to the Karma form – which linked to the Reincarnation form – Gwen was actually disheartened to see just how many people would come back under the “cockroach” category. 

There was also an Angel Advancement form, and there were a few names that Owen had apparently set aside to join the ranks of his Angels.  Gwen wondered just what qualified someone to become an Angel of Pestilence, and thought about asking one of the other PA’s, but thought it could wait.

She could remember when there had been an Armageddon called while she’d been in Guardians, and while there would always be her fellows who’d been out of a job when their charges were killed, there’d never been this much paperwork to release them from their assignments.   Here, she had to make note of every Angel that had worked on the affected worlds, and pass those names on to their individual departments for reassignment. 

She felt like she was drowning in forms.

The other PA’s were more than willing to help her.  Gwen was so very grateful for them, because she would have torn her hair out otherwise.  She’d had no idea that the Armageddon Department was such a bloody bureaucracy, and said so.

“The higher you get,” Rose said, “the more paper you get buried under.”

“You should see them in the Celestial Department,” Donna put in.  “And they don’t even have the computer system we have here.”

“Thank Tosh,” Diane sighed, “she set all this up.  From what I’ve heard, before we got all streamlined, it would take days to work up to an Armageddon.”

That was a truly scary thought.  It stopped Gwen from daydreaming that she’d accidentally stumbled into Purgatory, and that this was some sort of punishment before she was sent on to her final destination.  Because if she had been, it would have been infinitely worse, she believed.

At one point, Apocalypse and Death made an appearance; Ianto looked completely unruffled, as if he’d just been taking a stroll around the dimension instead of having been in flagrante in the stationary cupboard.  Jack was grinning like the cat that got the cream, and shamelessly flirted with all the PA’s, making them laugh and Gwen blush when it was her turn.  That man was hot!  It was too bad he was shagging Death, and that Gwen herself was with Rhys…oh well, you win some, you lose some.  It wouldn’t stop her from looking, though.

She took the opportunity after finishing the Restless Dead form to fetch Owen’s post-its, but as she got up she noticed Donna passing Death something…was that money?

So that was how Donna kept winning the pool…she’d need to remember never to bet against Donna when she was asked to join in!

Gwen spent a couple of pleasant minutes standing at the shelf where the post-its were kept, fantasizing about herself and Apocalypse in the very same place that he and Death had been, then duty – and reality – called her back to her job.  She grabbed the notes and headed to her desk, on the way poking her head back into Owen’s office just long enough to give him the brightly colored post-its.  He growled a thanks that didn’t sound at all sincere.

She continued to work, every time she thought she saw an end of it all, something else would ping into her inbox.  That was something else she was getting a crash course in: passing forms back and forth to her fellow PA’s.  There were some she couldn’t finish on her own, and it was with a sense of accomplishment when she’d be able to email something she’d completed on to its next victim.  So far, only one had come back to her, and it was because of a silly spelling error.

Maybe she was getting the hang of this!

When it was time for the Horsemen to leave, they exited their offices, coming to stand in the middle of the room.  Famine said something to Diane as he passed, but there weren’t any last instructions to anyone, for which Gwen was very glad for.  She had enough on her plate as it was, and had been dreading being given any more work before she had a chance to do what she had.

As the four stood there, the truth of who Gwen was actually working for really hit her.  Even though she’d been told that Owen Harper and the others were, indeed, the Four Horsemen of Apocalypse, there was something about seeing them gathered together like that, expressions of expectancy on their faces, that really brought it all home to her.  The realization made her feel like a very small fish in a really huge lake, something that she’d never considered before. 

Anyone looking at each man wouldn’t have necessarily noticed anything different about them; but there was an aura of power around them, and it raised the small hairs on Gwen’s arms as if static was filling the air.  The Horsemen held their symbols of office: scythe, sword, staff, and stalk; gone was the joking and sarcasm, replaced by a sense of purpose that also affected their PA’s.  No one dared break the atmosphere of anticipation by speaking.  The hush was deafening.

“Time to saddle up, boys.”

Gwen practically jumped at the familiar voice.

And Apocalypse arrived. 

He also hadn’t changed, still wearing the old-time clothing and greatcoat that he’d had on during the lunch meeting.  But he, also, seemed to radiate power as he passed Gwen’s desk and joined his Horsemen in the middle of the room. 

Each Horseman knelt to Apocalypse, accepting his sovereignty over them.  Gwen barely resisted the urge to do the same, seeing that all the other PA’s were remaining standing.  They might work for him, but he was the Horsemen’s leader.  They rode at his whim.

Apocalypse stepped in front of each man, Famine first, resting his hand on Andy’s bowed head, almost in benediction.

Andy Davidson took on the mantle of his office at Apocalypse’s touch.

A flair of light surrounded him, and when it was gone the true Famine was left behind.  He stood, brown robes swirling about his feet, hood hiding his fair hair.  He nodded, and Apocalypse moved to the next Horseman in line: Owen. 

The change was the same, only Pestilence’s robes were green.  War followed, his own robes blood red.  And, finally, there was Death, and if Apocalypse’s touch was more of a caress in his case, no one said anything.  Blackness coiled around him, transforming his suit into an inky match to the ceremonial robes the others wore.

Apocalypse also changed, even as he was blessing his Horsemen.  His tanned skin slowly turned golden, until he glowed like an ambulatory sun.  Only the coat remained the same, as if it was his own version of the robes worn by the others. 

Gwen was transfixed.  She’d never seen anything like this before, and it was awe-inspiring to witness.  She felt unbelievably small in the face of it, realizing that, while the Horsemen might be transitory, that Apocalypse would always remain, that he was truly a Celestial Being. 

No wonder he was so freaking hot.

She must have been staring, because she didn’t even register Rose tugging on her sleeve.  “C’mon, let’s go see them off.”

Gwen let herself be ushered toward the lift, following in the wake of their bosses.  It was a little weird in the lift car, what with being stuffed inside with five all-powerful beings – and it made her wonder why they didn’t just teleport or something to where they were going.

The door dinged open, and Gwen found herself and her fellow employees on the very rooftop.  The Chaos of the Veil arched overhead, and it made her feel even smaller than she had with the Horsemen.   She was seriously beginning to wonder if this was the place for her, but shoved the doubts away.  This was the chance of so many lifetimes, and she needed to get it right.

She joined the other PA’s just outside the lift doors, as their collected bosses made their way toward a quartet of horse-like creatures waiting on the roof.   They looked like horses, but there was something off about each one…like the glowing red eyes of the black stallion, or the sparks that flew from the red roan’s hooves as the animal danced in excitement.  The other two – one brown, and the other a yellowish cream – were more normal, but Gwen was certain there was something different about them, as well, even if it wasn’t obvious to her what it was.

As the Four Horsemen mounted, Gwen leaned over to Tosh, who stood next to her, “I thought Death rode a pale horse?” she asked silently, seeing the Horseman astride the black horse.

Tosh snorted.  “That’s only in the stories.  Pestilence actually has the palest horse.  Besides, Ianto wouldn’t want to clash with his mount.”

Okay, Gwen could see the reasoning behind that.

“Doesn’t Apocalypse get one?”

No,” the other PA answered.  “He doesn’t need one, being one of the Celestials.”

That also made sense.  While Gwen had never met one of the Celestials – until now, that was – she’d heard a lot of rumors about them.  They were the most powerful of all the beings of the Multiverse, one step down from Good and Evil Themselves.  As such, they tapped directly into the Warp and Weft of Creation for their abilities.  Mundane forms of transportation weren’t needed for them to get around.

The excitement was building.  Gwen could feel her heart beginning to race.  This was really happening!  She was standing on the roof of the Armageddon Department, with four other PA’s and the Four Horsemen and Apocalypse himself, and to think she’d only wanted to get the position in Provocation where she’d thought her skills might be more useful but she’d been hijacked by Pestilence to be his own Personal Assistant, and there was going to be a real Armageddon on her first day…

It then occurred to her that her mental voice was rambling, and told it to stop.

Gwen wondered just how crass it would be to ask them all for autographs.  Not for herself, but for Rhys of course.  After all, he collected their trading cards.

Oh…would she get a trading card, too?  Would people be asking for her autograph?

Stop it, Gwen…

The golden being that was Apocalypse turned to look at the spectators.  “Keep the coffee warm for us, ladies,” he called out.  “It’s going to be a long night.”

With those parting words, light flared around the Horsemen and Apocalypse, and when Gwen could see again, the five were gone.

“Well,” Donna drawled, “looks like it’s just us left.  We got more paperwork to do.”

The excitement within Gwen died.  She was really beginning to hate paperwork.



Who would've thought there'd be so much paperwork involved with an Armageddon? And of course the guys would have to make a dramatic exit. It would be quite something to see in person. Gwen wondering about autographs and trading cards. Too funny! Great update. Thanks.
Lots and lots of paperwork! Can you imagine how it would have been like before computerization?

Thanks a lot!
Eeep! I almost forgot... ***squeeeee*** The trading cards made an appearance!!!


Let's see, we've got Jack, Ianto, John, Tosh and now Donna's done...who next? Should probably finish of the set for the actual Horsemen, right? LOL
I had to have the trading cards in there! They're awesome! :)

Can't think of anyone else for the trading cards, what you've done is fantastic!
Loved it you have such a wonderful turn of phrase that sleep really paid off !!!!!
LOL! Naptimes are always a good thing! Thanks, hon!
That was awesome - off they go!
Thanks! Off to the Armageddon! You know, I'd totally have one if those five showed up for it!
Sneaky 'Death'....Just so Ianto, to rig a betting game like that.
I bet he can get Jack to do him anywhere, anytime..
He and Donna have a deal: He gets Jack whenever and wherever he wants, and Donna gets a bit of cash out of it. It's Win-Win! :)

awesome chapter.
Thanks so much!
Great chapter but I don't envy them all the paperwork. I can imagine that being the case. Sneaky Donna but I'd expect that.
Thanks! Ianto and Donna...plotters supreme!
I never thought I'd say this but "hell yeah bring on the paperwork". I would so put up with mountains of paperwork to work in that office and get the chance to catch JAck and Ianto at it.

Wow so JAck is celestial then, that is so cool. And he was so cute when giving out the raiments. So devoted to Ianto. Or at least I hope he is? I'd like to think he is. Oh damn I'm getting myself worried now.

And since the positions are temporary, how long do Horsemen live? Oh damnit I have way too many questions and I am rambling. Sigh, I'll shut up now.

But I still LOVE THIS!

Oh one thing though I was wondering could you provide a direct link to Bookwrms picture because I, the complete dunderhead that I am can't seem to find it. And I really wanna see what inspired you to create such a wonderful story.
I know what you mean. I'd gladly deal with the forms if it meant seeing two completely different forms in action!

Yes Jack is devoted to Ianto, don't worry. The Horsemen can leave their jobs whenever they want, but they're like really powerful Angels...they aren't mortal. So don't be concerned about that!

The link for the original picture is:


She made more cards here:


Thank you, they're really gorgeous. I may have to print them, then I can pretend that they're real and be a big fan like Rhys. I hope we get to see him in the fic, it would be so cute to see him going all fanboy over the horsemen, especially if Ianto was his favorite and JAck got a little jealous. Can't wait for the next chapter ^_^.